Bio Bargain Bin. By John Patrick Robbins

I have read author's bios, that at times say more than the poem itself.

They're rambling and speak of greatness.

That makes me double check the submission, to see if there is something I missed.

But often it's just a bunch of hot air and artistic bullshit.

I once received a submission from a writer I admire.

"Hey John, this is total shit! But thanks for reading."

I sent this said writer a quick reply.

"Hey no need for an apology, I deal with more shit than a sanitation worker on a daily basis. It's a no from me, but I passed it on to Dope Fiend Daily.They have ultra low standards and the editor is a total basket case."

The writer waited a day to reply and when he did so the email seemed a bit awkward.

 

"John, umm thanks I guess."

He probably viewed me as a prick and thought I was more than a little bit strange.

And now he knew exactly how it was to be the guy dealing with whacked out emotional basket cases.

All standing upon the verge, of love and rage with a simple.

Yes or no.

I may no longer be working the floor as a bouncer. But in the  literary world I was very much still watching the door.

My bio is always quick and to the point and sometimes a bit strange.

Because if your not having fun then why the fuck are you doing this to begin with?

Cause it's damn sure not for the money or fame.

If your bio speaks about your greatness then don't you think your words should actually back it up?

Place pretentious long winded bio nobody's reading here.

Toodles.

John Patrick Robbins, is the editor of The Rye Whiskey Review and The Black Shamrock Magazine.

His work has been published in.

San Pedro River Review, Punk Noir Magazine, San Antonio Review, Romingos Blog, Piker Press, The Blue Nib. 1870 Magazine, Heroin Love Songs, Fearless Poetry Zine, Schlock Magazine.

His work is always unfiltered.